• Ryan McRostie

Seven Inexpensive Ways To Decorate Your Testes.



Decoration your testicles is an age old practice which can be done on your own or with a loved one.

With the lockdown approaching its fourth month, people are bored. They’ve played all the video games, they’ve heard all the podcasts. But there’s one hobby that is sweeping the county, Teste Decorating. Decorating your testes goes back centuries, but it has taken the current global crisis to bring the practice back to popularity.


“I love making my testes look more pleasing”, said Jason Jones, “I’ve had so many complaints over the years that my balls were an eyesore”! Many companies are capitalising on the new trend offering a variety of service to beautify one’s balls. Jody McAlpine from Get Great Balls share’s her top ways people can participate on even the smallest budget.


Here are Jody’s tips:

  • Cover your balls in glue then roll them around in glitter.

  • Get some confetti and stick them all over the scrotum.

  • Use watercolours to paint them.

  • Decorate them with lace. Who said lace is just for ladies.

  • Tattoo your balls to make them look great forever.

  • Stick food to them.

  • Hang decorations from pubic hair in the style of a Christmas tree.

Hotwire News takes no responsibility for any injures sustained while implementing these techniques.

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