• Ryan McRostie

Buddha diagnosed with type 2 diabetes.

Buddha has been warned numerous times to try and restrict his caloric intake.

Buddha, the deity of the religion that bears his name has been diagnosed with type 2 diabetes after undergoing a routine test. Many of his followers had tried to warn him, but the Buddhas diet of highly processed sugars and carbs led to his weight skyrocketing in recent years.

“We love him to bits”, said one follower, “but he has to start taking care of himself”. Many gods have struggled with their weight in recent years with like like of Thor and Isis packing on the pounds. One god told Hotwire, “we have it pretty easy, you know! Normally we just set up a universe and let the inhabitants crack on. There’s not much to it”!

Those closest to Buddha have started a GoFund me page to purchase him a subscription to Weight Watchers and Peleton.

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