• Ryan McRostie

Man turns up to work wearing nappy.

A man concerned there would be no toilet paper at work has decided to go into work wearing a diaper. “I wasn’t taking any chances you know”, said Jack, “plus I’ll be able to get more work done now that I can poo at my desk”. The rush on toilet paper has seen other products also dragged into bizarre behaviour. “We had one guy come in and take all the water fire extinguishers”, said one worker, “apparently he was going to wash his arse with them”! People across the country have started using all kinds of novel approaches to cleansing their behind. “People can use anything,” said one scientist, “leaves are great, pieces of bark are perfect, try not to use animals though, the RSPCA hates that”.

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